As you take the opportunity to browse over my thoughts keep in mind that I write it as I feel it. Isn't that the way all writing should be?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

But I looooove him...

You love him. You cherish him. But does he do the same for you? Since when did we as women decide it was ok to settle on whatever walks into our lives? Why are women accepting substandard men? How does that make sense? You work all day to provide food for the house, yet he stays home and plays video games. You have to beg him to spend time with you, yet the moment a homeboy pops up he is gone. You're in school because where you are is not where you plan on staying, he has been the same loser for the last 2,3,4,5 years you've been together. You have never been in trouble a day in your life, he's in and out of jail like its his second home. The place is in your name, yet he walks around like he runs it. You can do so much better, yet he knows you're not going anywhere. You are 100% faithful, yet you can't say the same for him. What makes you think you deserve this? Why do you not see yourself as the wonderful being that you are? How can you think this is love? Men the same goes for you. Why are you settling for women that you know are beneath you? You give her your heart and soul, she wants shoes and clothes. You constantly lift her up, she constantly puts you down. You want the family life, she wants the fast life. You know you can do better, she knows you won't go far. Come on my fellow people, you deserve better so go get it

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Maybe it is time for me to go on hiatus... Too much is going on in my life and I think I need to step away for a while. It seems like the need to get away has been hitting people left and right. I have friends that have either disappeared for an extended period of time or are going on their hiatus now. I think I may need to follow suit. I have school which is only going to get harder. There is the BS with my sister that seems to only get worse and that is stressing me out. This month makes 10 years since my mother lost her battle to cancer. And just for effect I am losing someone that I consider family to an illness that she shouldn't have to suffer with. When is enough too much? I keep getting told that God never puts more on you than you can bear, call me what you want but that statement is a lie and I will tell anyone that I feel that way. Have I stopped believing in God? NO, I know he is up there. Do I believe in the God portrayed in the Bible? That is what I have to figure out. I need to step away from things and do some SERIOUS soul searching because my vision is cloudy right now.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


How do you fight an emotion as strong as hatred? I am slowly being consumed by this feeling and I know how I am when I get this way. I don't want to feel it. I have felt this emotion so strongly before that I nearly lost myself in it. I have to fight it. I have to stay strong. I cannot let hatred take over. I am angry but I must deal with it now before it turns in to something more. She has pissed me off yet again. She is trying to rob me of my happiness. I WILL NOT LET HER SUCCEED. I will be fine, I know I will. God has me and with him, all things are possible...

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Just not that in to you

How do you tell someone that it is never going to happen? I am normally able to say exactly what I feel but for some reason I am apprehensive about hurting people's feelings. We had something together at one time. He let it go. Now he wants it back and I am just not feeling it. I have moved on. I have grown up. I have found someone that makes me happy. I think I am in my happy place right now... And now all of a sudden not one, but two exes decide to pop back into my life and claim a place. Uh no, it doesn't work like that honey. What bothers me is I was hurt by both of these people and yet I cannot bring myself to be hurtful to them. I guess I should take that as a positive because it means my attitude is improving (doesn't it?). I want to tell them to "eat dick and die" but yet that just shows resentment and I am over the past. It happened, we were young, they were stupid. But that still leaves me in this predicament, how do I get it through to them that they stand no chance without having to revert to the asshole I once was...

Welcome to where the wild things are...

This is my page. I will tell you now that I am a strange one and my mind is never in one place for longer than like, a minute. Expect my blogs to have absolutely NOTHING to do with each other! These are my thoughts about life, the universe, and everything (gotta love Douglas Adams). Feel free to check out my blogs and whether you agree, disagree, or could care less, comment!